


Don't Tell Me You're Too Blind to See

by LourdesDeath



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Crack, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Pranks and Practical Jokes, Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-16
Updated: 2017-02-16
Packaged: 2018-09-24 19:29:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,347
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9781889
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LourdesDeath/pseuds/LourdesDeath
Summary: Tony plays a Valentine's Day prank on Steve.





	1. We Know the Game

**Author's Note:**

> I have left some tags out to keep the punchline a secret. 
> 
> Chapter 1 has a potential for second-hand embarrassment, which is resolved in chapter 2.

Tony finds Steve in the common area of Stark Tower, reading an a book (probably on military history or the Lindy Hop or some other grandpa subject), and takes a seat beside him on the sofa.

“So, I’ve been thinking,” Tony says.

“That’s a shock,” Steve interrupts. “I thought you needed Pepper for that.”

Tony scowls at him. “Very funny. Just because she didn’t like my present—”

Steve gives him a look. He’d tried to do sky writing with his suits… across the entirety of Manhattan. People had seen the lines and lines of Iron Men and thought they were under attack. Pepper had looked about ready to cook him on the spot.

“ _Anyway_ ,” Tony says, waving a hand in the air to get the conversation back into his court, “I was thinking. I know how much Barnes means to you, and I thought I’d give you a hand.” He pulls out his phone. “I know it can be hard to find the words to say how you feel, especially when you’ve been head over heels for the better part of a century, so I found you this poem.”

Steve looks skeptical, but he takes Tony’s phone and reads the webpage.

His eyes get big as they scan over the words.

The man actually _tears up_.

“Tony,” he says, his voice thick with emotion. “This is… this is perfect.”

Tony almost feels bad when Steve asks for a copy of the page.

Tony is gleeful, but does what he can to look unexcited. He’d made a fake webpage for the “poem”, not even bothering to change the names on it, since it’s not like Rogers actually _googles_ anything.

Steve disappears to his floor.

Not long afterwards, Barnes takes his place in the common rooms with a shrug and a comment about Steve needing some private time.

Hours pass, making Tony start to actually worry.

He takes an elevator to Steve’s floor, half considering apologizing and telling him everything, and finds entire apartment in a disarray.

Tony knows how neat Steve likes to keep his living space, so seeing random shit all over the floors and every drawer opened and empty is concerning.

“Where is it!?” he hears Steve saying, and follows the sounds of him rifling through his belongings to his bedroom.

“Lose something, Cap?” he says, just as Steve makes a triumphant noise.

Steve jumps, turning towards Tony from where he’d been kneeling on the floor. His hands are clasped behind his back, clearly hiding something.

“What’s that?” Tony asks.

“Nothing,” Steve replies, looking like he’s been caught swearing in church.

“I didn’t hear about the tornado warning,” Tony says, acting like he’s fooled by Steve’s act.

“Sorry?” Steve says.

Waving a hand at the disaster zone that is Steve’s room, he raises his eyebrows. “What happened?”

“I was…” Steve looks around, his blue eyes wide. “I was looking for my tie,” he finally says, making a vague gesture in the direction of his bed.

It’s the only place in his room that’s not touched by the mess; a blue suit is laid out across it.

“Any plans for tonight? Taking Barnes out for some whoopee-making time?”

Steve’s ears turn pink. “ _No_. He’s—We’re not—”

Tony smirks. “Well, you two kids have a nice night, then,” he says, turning around to leave.

“Wait!”

Tony stops halfway through the door.

Steve’s cheeks go red. “How fast do you think you could get some food brought up to the common rooms?”

“I already ordered a Valentine’s dinner for everyone to be delivered in an hour,” Tony replies. “Spaghetti. So everyone can do that thing from _Lady and the Tramp_. You’ve seen that one, right?”

 “Yes, I’ve seen it,” Steve growls.

How has Tony never had a competition to see who can make Steve blush the most?

Ever the tactician, Steve tries to distract Tony from spaghetti kisses.

“Can you keep Bucky downstairs until dinner?” he asks. “I… wanted to make sure I got the words right.”

Tony nods. “I’ll let him beat me at Mario Kart for you, but you’ll owe me one.”

“Thanks.”

Tony leaves after that, trying not to think about whatever Steve has planned for Barnes.

At least it’s made easier when he _tries_ to play video games against Barnes.

“Why do I always end up playing against _you_?” he moans when his pride starts to feel a bit bruised (which really means after three races). “At least when I played Nat I could win sometimes.”

“That was _one time_ ,” Natasha retorts through a mouthful of chocolate cupcake. The icing had had something that looked suspiciously like a black fondant paw print on it when she’d opened the little box it was delivered in, but Tony isn’t about to risk whatever body parts she’ll cut off if he teases her about having a boyfriend. She takes a sip of wine. “And it doesn’t count anyway, since you only won because my wrist was broken.”

Tony is a grown man and also a genius and therefore _doesn’t_ pout, but he does glare at her until the elevators open, revealing Steve wearing the suit from before.

He looks more than a little apprehensive, his blue eyes locked on Barnes’s dark head on the other side of the sofa.

“Buck?” he says, and Barnes finally turns around.

His own eyes get big when he sees Steve. “Hey, pal.”

Steve bites his lip, looking around. “Can I talk to you?”

Barnes gets up and walks over to him. They talk for a few moments in low voices, Steve brushing Barnes’s long hair out of his face, slowly running his fingers through the dark locks.

He pulls something out of his pocket and gets down on one knee.

Tony’s pretty sure that everyone was watching them before, but even Natasha puts down her wineglass and the remains of her cupcake and stares when Steve presents a tiny box to Barnes.

“Bucky,” Steve says. “I’ve spent a long time trying to say this to you, and today I finally found the words.” He takes Barnes’s flesh hand in his. “We’ve known each other for so long. You know the rules and so do I. A full commitment’s what I’m thinking of. You wouldn’t get this from any other guy.”

Tony wants to faint.

“I just want to tell you how I’m feeling,” Steve continues. “Gotta make you understand. That I’m never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down. Never gonna run around and desert you. I’m never gonna make you cry, never gonna say goodbye. Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you.”

Barnes’s eyes are damp. He kneels down in front of Steve and kisses him.

Everyone claps when Steve slips a silver ring onto Bucky’s finger, but Tony can feel Natasha’s eyes on him.

He’s going to die, but it was worth it.

…Or at least, he _hopes_ it was.


	2. Always Coming From Take Me Down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's hard to troll a troll.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 82% of all people don't know the opposite words for the following:   
> 1\. Always  
> 2\. Coming  
> 3\. From  
> 4\. Take  
> 5\. Me  
> 6\. Down

Steve’s minding his own business in the common room when Tony finds him. He’s not doing anything, just reading _Persuasion_. Anne’s just had her rowdy nephew pulled off of her by Wentworth, but he can’t read any further because Tony’s sitting next to him.

Tony looks a little smug, which is worrying, especially since the morning was mostly ruined when they were called out to deal with what people thought was some sort of robot invasion but was actually just Tony’s disastrous attempt at wooing Pepper.

Steve wishes Tony could just accept the fact that what she wants most of all for Valentine’s day is a box of chocolate and a quiet night in.

“So,” Tony says, drumming his fingers on the back of the sofa, “I’ve been thinking…”

Steve doesn’t even need to look up from his book, although he’s too distracted to keep reading. “That’s a shock. I thought you needed Pepper for that.”

“Very funny,” Tony says, making a face. “Just because she didn’t like my present…”

Thankfully, he shuts up when Steve finally looks up from his book, or he’d have to tell him to get to the damn point.

“Anyway, I was thinking. I know how much Barnes means to you, and I thought I’d give you a hand.”

As if Steve needs help with _that_ of all things.

“I know it can be hard to find the words to say how you feel, especially when you’ve been head over heels for the better part of a century, so I found you this poem.”

Steve wants to roll his eyes, but it’s not like it’s _Tony’s_ fault that they never told him… or anyone else, really. And he wants to hope for the best.

Maybe, just this once, Tony’s not playing a prank.

So he takes Tony’s phone and looks down at the words.

He can’t help his eyes getting big as he reads the words—he’s outraged that Tony would try and do this to them, try and make a _joke_ out of their relationship—but then an idea forms in his head.

It’s as wicked as Stark’s plan.

Steve wants to laugh, wants to throw it back in Tony’s face, but he takes a breath.

Tony forgets that Steve was an actor, even if it wasn’t for long. The USO girls taught him their tricks while on the road, and he’s thankful each and every one of them as he feels his eyes starting to water.

“Tony, this is…” he says, and he hopes his voice doesn’t sound as enraged as he feels. He clears his throat. “This is perfect. Can I have a copy of it?”

Tony looks stunned. “Uh. Yeah. I’ll send a copy to your phone.”

Steve closes _Persuasion_ , knowing he probably won’t have a chance to read any more of it before the end of the night. “Thank you, Tony.”

“Any time.”

Steve departs for the elevator, pulling out his phone to give the impression of rereading the song lyrics in case Tony watches the footage.

When he’s safely back on his own floor and the doors are closed, he sighs, trying to let out the anger he feels at Tony as well as the excitement about his own plan.

“Everything alright, doll?” Bucky asks from the chair where he likes to sit.

“Yeah,” Steve replies, striding over to him. “Just… Tony.”

Bucky leans up for a kiss, then curls his arm around Steve’s neck to pull him closer and deepen it.

The chair isn’t really wide enough for him to settle into it, straddling Bucky’s thighs, but Steve does it anyway.

“Oof!” Bucky says as he suddenly has a lapful—and perhaps a faceful—of Steve. “Y’know, you’re not as small as you think you are.” He runs a hand through Steve’s hair. “Stark really did a number on you, didn’t he?”

Steve kisses his cheek. “No, but I was hoping you’d help me.”

“Oh, no,” Bucky groans. “Not another one of your bright ideas.”

It’s not all that effective to give him a shove when Bucky is under him and partially made of metal, but Steve’s always been okay with losing to Bucky.

“This one’s not too bad.” He picks up his phone from where he’d dropped it on the side table between Bucky’s chair and the sofa where he likes to sit. “So,” he begins, “do you know what Rickrolling is?”

Bucky’s face develops a blankness. “Steve, I was under Hydra’s control for _seventy years_. You know the kind of people I had to deal with while I was there. Is there any scenario in which I _wouldn’t_ know about Rickrolling?

Steve snorts and taps on his phone to turn the screen on. “Well, Tony gave me this and assumed that I _didn’t_ know what it is.”

Bucky rolls his eyes the second he looks at the screen. “’Written by Richard P. Astley’? How thick does he think you are?”

Resting his head on Bucky’s shoulder, Steve massages the line of scars where his left arm was grafted onto him.

“I was thinking I’d make him regret it. Ask you out with the lyrics so he feels bad.”

Bucky sighs as Steve warms the skin where it tends to ache from the weight of the arm.

He pulls Steve even closer. “You could do better than that,” he says.

“I am not using a Rick Astley song for my wedding vows, Buck. Even if it’s fake.”

Grinning wickedly, Bucky  “No, but there’s asking someone out and then there’s asking someone to _marry you_.”

Steve sits up, the ideas dawning on him. “I could be nervous about it, and make it romantic for you. A declaration of love in front of all my friends.”

Bucky nods.

“He’ll feel _awful_.”

Steve kisses Bucky, and then kisses him again, and a few more times after that. “You… are the most perfect… and brilliant man… I’ve ever met,” he says between the times their lips touch.”

“I know.” Bucky smirks. “What are your orders, Captain?”

“I’m afraid I need some time alone, dear. I can’t possibly surprise you if you’re here when I’m preparing myself.” He thinks for a moment. “But I need to know if anyone comes to check on me. I can’t have them ruining it for you.”

“Roger that.”

Steve rolls his eyes, but immediately forgives Bucky when he’s given a final kiss and a gentle push to get up.

Bucky grabs his phone and a book and heads for the elevator.

“Hey, Steve,” he says.

“Yeah, Buck?”

Bucky grins. “Don’t let me down.”

Steve laughs and shrugs. “I won’t, as long as you don’t give me up.”

Bucky’s still chuckling as the elevator doors open.

Looking around the apartment, Steve thinks about how he can sell his story.

He starts by pulling out a suit—Bucky’s not likely to miss the irony of _which_ suit it is—and finding the two ring boxes they keep stored in their safe with the certificate. He then starts to make a mess, emptying out drawers, piling up the contents of cabinets, and scattering random objects around their apartment. 

When he finishes that, he waits.

(It’s at this point when he realizes he’s left _Persuasion_ downstairs, but he pulls it up on his laptop and continues where he left off.)

An hour later, he gets a text from Bucky.

_Incoming_

Steve closes his laptop and puts it away. He listens for the elevator doors to open to shout about not being able to find something.

“Aha!” he says just as Tony’s about to turn  from the hallway into his bedroom.

Their conversation goes exactly as planned. Tony’s intrigued by the ring box Steve’s holding behind his back, but not willing to actually _ask_ about it, Steve tells a lie as poorly as Stark expects him to, and he blushes enough times to get Stark thinking he’s succeeded.

Steve cleans up the apartment when he’s gone, then takes a quick shower and gets into his suit.

It fits him just as well as before, which is unsurprising but still makes Steve smile.

He contemplates wearing his father’s cufflinks, but decides the occasion isn’t special enough. He grabs a newer, plain pair instead.

Steve rereads the page on his phone a few times, figuring out how he’ll phrase everything for maximum effect.

Tony’s pouting at Natasha when Steve gets down to the common floor, Mario Kart paused on the TV. Bucky’s sitting next to Tony, looking down at what Steve can only guess is the book he brought down.

Everyone goes quiet when Steve calls out to him.

Bucky’s eyes go wide when he sees Steve, no doubt noticing the suit. “Hey, pal.”

Steve’s heart starts to beat a little harder. For all that this is just a way to get back at Tony, and not the first proposal in their relationship, it’s still _a proposal of marriage_.

“Can I talk to you?” he asks, feeling a little embarrassed.

He pulls Bucky aside.

“You look nice,” Bucky says. “I’d’ve changed if I’d known.”

Steve brushes his hair out of his face, and can’t help it when his hand lingers, feeling the soft silkiness as it runs over his fingers. “You look fine,” he says earnestly.

“I just feel underdressed.”

Steve can see Tony out of the corner of his eye, watching them intently.

He pulls the ring box from his pocket.

It’s actually the box for Steve’s ring. Bucky’s holds two: one that was specially made to clip onto his metal ring finger and a normal ring for his right hand. Steve can still remember what he’d said when they were deciding on it. “ _I want to be able to feel what we’ve done._ ”

He could feel everyone giving up the pretense of not paying attention when he got down on one knee—which was more familiar than several of them would realize.

“Bucky, I’ve spent a long time trying to say this to you, and today I finally found the words,” he says, taking Bucky’s right hand. Steve’s hands might’ve been shaking before that, but he finds steadiness in the man he loves.

There’s a little twinkle of mischief in Bucky’s eyes, a subtle dare to _do it_.

Steve takes a breath. There’s no time like the present, and he can’t stop now that he’s started.

“We’ve known each other for so long. You know the rules and so do I. A full commitment’s what I’m thinking of. You wouldn’t get this from any other guy.”

Tony has gone white in the corner of Steve’s eye. Bucky’s face might be twitching with the effort of not laughing.

 “I just want to tell you how I’m feeling. Gotta make you understand,” Steve keeps saying. “That I’m never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down. Never gonna run around and desert you. I’m never gonna make you cry, never gonna say goodbye. Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you.”

Bucky’s cheeks are pink. Anyone who doesn’t know him as well as Steve might think it’s embarrassment or a blush. Steve can see it for what it really is: he’s holding his breath so he doesn’t giggle.

Steve goes through the entire song, repeating the refrain _all four times_.

Tony looks like he could use a fainting sofa.

Bucky kneels down and kisses Steve, his eyes damp.

Steve cradles Bucky’s face with his left hand and kisses him back, deepening it just a little: a promise of how good their Valentine’s day will be once they’re done playing malicious pranks on their teammates.

He slips the vibranium ring—one of T’challa’s wedding presents to them—onto Bucky’s left hand, ignoring Bucky’s huff of laughter at him putting the normal ring on his metal hand. They’ll have to switch it out for the correct one later.

Steve feels an actual blush when everyone applauds them. Fake or not, this was him telling their friends about the nature of their relationship. Bucky kisses him again, and Steve feels a little less scared, and even smiles. The ring is a promise of the vows they made in Wakanda, but now they have another meaning: that they’re not going to give each other up or let each other down.

(And if he looks over and sees Natasha staring knowingly at Tony, it only sweetens the deal.)


	3. Never Gonna Let You Down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter got waaaaaaaaaaay more feels-y than I meant for it to be.

Tony looks shell-shocked the rest of the night. Steve can tell he’s trying to work up the nerve to apologize, but everyone keeps interrupting.

(Natasha is as single-minded in teasing Tony as she is in missions. She spends about ten minutes talking about how deep and loving the proposal was, even though she was a guest—or, rather, officiant—at their actual wedding.)

When Steve and Bucky make it upstairs, they’ve eaten enough celebratory cake and wine to fill even two supersoldiers.

They collapse on the sofa with twin moans of relief and look at each other.

Steve can’t keep it in any longer, he starts laughing at the same time as Bucky.

“Well, husband-mine,” Bucky says when they’ve caught their breath. “Now what?”

“Shouldn’t that be ‘fiancé-mine’?” Steve replies.

Bucky rolls his eyes.

“Is it okay?” Steve asks, feeling abruptly sober about the whole affair. What if Bucky’s not comfortable with it? What if someone tries to hurt them? What if—

Bucky reaches over and runs a thumb over Steve’s forehead. “Stop your fretting or you’ll get wrinkles.”

“I’m over one hundred years old. I think I deserve some wrinkles,” Steve replies.

As always, Bucky sees right through him. “It’ll be fine, Steve,” he says, transferring the ring on his left ring finger to his right hand.

Steve gets up to get their other two wedding rings.

“You think Stark’s gonna think we had some Vegas-style wedding when he sees us tomorrow?” Bucky asks when he returns.

Steve clips the ring onto Bucky’s metal hand. “He might be too tired to notice. I don’t think he’ll be able to sleep with the guilt.”

“Why don’t we put him out of his misery, then?” Bucky asks as he returns the favor for Steve, kissing the back of Steve’s hand when he’s done.

“Seems only fair, I guess,” Steve replies. “I wouldn’t want him embarrassing himself tomorrow.”

\--

Tony stops trying to sleep at 8. He thinks he’s only gotten about two hours of sleep which—well, to be honest it’s not far outside the norm for him, but he usually gets that much sleep because he’s _working_ , not because of guilt.

“Friday, you know where Rogers is?”

_“Captain Rogers is on the shared floor, sir.”_

Well, at least he’s in the building and, presumably, awake. Tony doesn’t think he could spend much longer waiting to apologize.

He takes the elevator, not even bothering to change. He wants to _get it over with_ , even if he’s wearing the ridiculous pajamas with cartoon Avengers on them.

Tony runs through ways to make it sound sincere. Steve’s not particularly forgiving except when Barnes is involved.

He drags a hand through his hair, trying to get it into something resembling neatness as the floor number drops.

The doors open and Tony steps out… then almost steps right back in when a familiar tune starts playing.

“ _We're no strangers to love. You know the rules and so do I. A full commitment's what I'm thinking of. You wouldn't get this from any other guy…_ ”

It’s loud enough to make him yelp (why the hell did he have to install that sound system?), but not quite loud enough to cover the sound of laughter.

He can also distinctly hear Rogers singing along to the song.

Christ. Did the serum enhance how loud he can sing? Tony doesn’t want to imagine some ninety pound asthmatic singing this loud—he probably would’ve given himself an aneurysm or something.

It’s made even more obnoxious when he realizes that Rogers is _serenading_ Barnes, who looks entirely too amused by the whole thing.

The song finally (finally!) ends, and Tony puts his hands up in defeat.

“Okay, okay. I suppose I deserved that,” he concedes.

Rogers and Barnes are kissing in the corner like a pair of lovebirds, and Tony gapes when he sees the wedding rings on their fingers.

“You might want to see this,” Natasha says just as he’s about to ask.

It’s a photo album, bound in a soft white fabric with two interlocking rings embroidered on the cover with silver thread. Tony opens it up and feels his eyes go wide.

The photographs are expertly taken, and Tony wonders if they used a drone or Wanda’s magic to take some of them, since they’re at angles not easily reached by a normal human.

Natasha’s at the center, with Steve and Barnes on either side. Sam stands behind Steve while T’challa’s behind Barnes.

“When was this?” he didn’t mean to ask—because he has an idea of what the answer will be.

“Not long after I woke up,” Barnes replies.

Steve looks sad beside him. For all he said the Avengers were more Tony’s family than his own, it must’ve hurt to have such a sparse gathering at his wedding.

One photograph has a few wispy lines of reddish smoke around the edges. Wanda’s in that one, holding a little cushion with three rings on it—the rings Steve and Barnes are wearing now.

Tony misses her, and has wanted to apologize for treating her like the way he did, but he hasn’t seen her since her arrest and transport to the Raft, and it’s not something he can do through a phone call.

He’s not sure whether he should feel happy or sad or angry.

“Would you believe,” Barnes says, interrupting the awkward silence that’s fallen, “that yesterday’s little performance was the _third_ marriage proposal in our relationship?”

“Your _third_?” Tony asks, dragging his eyes—and thoughts—from the pictures.

Steve nods, smiling. “Bucky proposed when he was drafted. We didn’t think we’d ever actually get married, though.”

“And this sap proposed in Wakanda,” Barnes adds. “Even if it was a marriage of convenience.”

Sputtering, Steve glares at him. “It was _not_. I just wanted to make sure we had legal protection when we moved back to the states.”

“That is the definition of a marriage of convenience, Rogers,” Barnes says, poking his… husband… in the chest.

Tony laughs at that, and closes the album. He doesn’t want to think about how he played a major role in tearing their little mismatched family apart.

But he feels the soft fabric in his hands.

“Well, how about giving it another shot? Since you got engaged again yesterday.”

He can see Steve’s fingers tighten around Barnes’s. “I’d like that,” he says.

Tony hadn’t realized, when he’d try to play the prank on Steve, that the song was ironically accurate for him. He didn’t give up on people or desert them or say goodbye, even when he thought they’d been dead for decades or found at that they’d been brainwashed and forgotten who he was.

And, if a video titled “Tony Stark gets Rickrolled!” goes viral within the next twelve hours…

Well, Tony honestly had it coming.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that is the end! I hope y'all enjoyed my little fic. Please comment if you liked it~! (Because I'm always a slut for comments <3)

**Author's Note:**

> Title comes from Rick Astley's 'Never Gonna Give You Up', of course :p


End file.
